Wordy Wednesday

So much to report, and yet, I have little ability to find the words to say...I've hesitated to blog because I just don't feel the need to vent and update like I did while in the "waiting" stages.

5 topics for today:

1. New house
2. Family Time
3. Pampered Chef
4. Adoption
5. School

Here goes:
1. New house - It's official.  Our address has been changed, and mail should begin to arrive next week.  We still have a little work to do on getting things out of the garage at the old house, but the new house is shaping up just fine.

For those who do not know, we moved in to an "apartment" in my in-laws home.  They have been so so gracious to help us maintain our own "home" and have cleared out tons of space for us to store our things.  It truly is a blessing.  They're GREAT!  Sveta only has "escaped" into their side of the house a few times, and we're working on when that is appropriate, and when it's not!  Haha...she will get it eventually (maybe).

2. Family Time - I'm looking for ways to make our family time purposeful and deliberate...so that we are spending quality time together doing things that we enjoy and bring us rest...rather than just being near each other.  Any ideas are helpful!!  I'm excited about family and friend field trips I've got planned, and hopefully starting some holiday traditions with our little family.  This year will be the first that Barry and I have put a Christmas tree up together...and I LOVE Christmas time...so it makes me happy.

I also have been trying to plan meals more effectively so that we have more time to be together without me laboring in the kitchen.  My new plan starts next week.  I've created 8 weeks of meals, grocery lists, and recipes, so I can grab a week and GO.  Hopefully this will work well.  I'll let you know (if I remember). 

3. Pampered Chef - I love working for this business, but I'm struggling with how much to throw myself into it.  I enjoy it immensely, but I don't want it to become a focus over my family.  I pray that I will be able to use it to serve and assist my family...and that it doesn't become an idol.

I'm pretty excited about a few new ideas I have for shows, and how I can use my products to make QUICK dinners for my family.  And, I want to use the business for His glory, not my own.  I'm learning a lot about how to use facebook, and how not to use it...and I've used it incorrectly to try to promote PC before.  So, I am sorry.  It will not happen again.

4. Adoption - There's still paperwork to be done that I keep avoiding.  I just want to spend time with Sveta and watch her grow.  But, she needs a social security number, a passport, and other things too.  Argh...Paperwork is not my friend.

On a different note, my friend Melissa finally has Hudson home!  Praise God!
My friend Jennifer, is going to get "sweet girl" sometime next month from an orphanage I've visited multiple times.
My dear friends, Mitch and Courtney, and praying about the next steps in their adoption process.
And, me, well, I'm praying about how to get our church/community educated about adoption: foster, domestic, and international.  Curious about how you can get involved?  Let me know, maybe we can work together on CCOGB and Greensburg!  I don't have time to create something on my own to educate, but I do have info on lots of resources.

5. School - OH MY GOODNESS!!  Sveta is doing so great in school...and I'm channeling my inner preschool teacher these days.  We've created a word wall for her sight words, a calendar, a little pocket chart, and a weather and seasons chart.  I'm going to cut out shapes to cut number of school days, and I'm hoping for a little white board or chalk board or writing tablet to practice different things on!  It's like our own little classroom in her new HUGE bedroom.  She even has 2 little old school desks from a nearby school that her Nana had.  So great.  I'll try to post a pic sometime!

Here's a list of some of the things she can do:
1. Name and name sounds of all letters (upper and lowercase)
2. Sound out consonant - vowel - consonant words (bat, hop, etc)
3. Recognize the words a, and, the, I, cat, day
4. Spell her first name
5. Write her first name
6. Write capital letters A - W
7. Write some lowercase letters
8. Count to 60
9. Recognize numbers 1-20
10. Recite at least 3 Bible Verses:  Phil. 2:14, John 3:16, Col. 2:10

She ROCKS.

P.S. - The cost of our adoption is on my to do list to figure out.  We've had several people ask where we are on the total cost, and on funding.  Our Boaz account has been emptied, but the only expenses left are the post-placement reports.  :)  Praise God.

Confessions of a Writer's Failure

I l.o.v.e. to write.  Not poetry, not fiction, but just write.  I love great pens (I'm kind of a sucker for a great pen) and I love to get a new journal.  I love the feel of cardstock when I write on a card.  I love even typing my thoughts as I think them, and writing out prayers or letters (some of which I never even give).  But, here's my confession...as much as I want to be really good at writing a handwritten note, putting it in an envelope, addressing it, making sure it has correct postage, and getting it in the mailbox, I'm not good at it at all.  I write notes all the time to find them months later without a stamp. 

Let me start by saying I'm sorry.  I'm sorry that you gave, and you did not receive a thank you note.  I even had Sveta color pictures to send as notes once.  They are no longer able to be found.  I really want to express my appreciation for each individual gift and gesture, but now have no memory able to keep track of it all.  Sadly, I have failed.  Failed at writing thank you notes diligently.  Failed at thank you each properly for all of the sacrifices you have made to bring Sveta home.

So, here's my attempt to say thank you for being part of our lives for the last 19 months (or more):

Thank you. 
Thank you,
for praying,
for encouraging,
for bringing meals,
for buying toys, clothes, food, etc.
for sharing in the cost of our adoption,
for donating items to help ofset the cost of the adoption,
for loving us,
for loving Sveta,
for loving Jesus,
and orphans.

There have been so many who have shared the financial burden of adoption with us, and we cannot thank you enough.  I've not got the complete total figured, but it was well over what we anticipated spending to begin with...and yet, GOD has provided so many to join with us and bring Sveta home.

There have been so many who've brought a meal over, given a gift card, or treated us to ice cream right when we needed it.

There are many who've sent encouraging notes, emails, comments, texts, etc...and without those we would have been so discouraged.

There are many who respected our need to protect Sveta when she first came home...and it's paid off.  She's bonding well, and has a place in our family and knows it.  She's amazing...and she's already learning about who Jesus is (thanks to many of you).

We are so grateful for all that you sacrificed to help Sveta come home.  She is a joy to us everyday and we are so thankful that you were willing to be part of Sveta's story.

Are you willing to be part of another orphan's story?  (No, we're not planning to adopt again...yet)
I am so thankful that many took part in bringing Sveta home, now I wonder how many other orphans could have a home if we were willing to sacrifice again.  Let me know if you'd be interested in helping Greensburg as a community to be more aware of the needs of the fatherless in our community and world.  Let me know if you'd be willing to give some of your time to educate some, advocate for some, or even adopt some.

Check these websites out, and stay tuned for ways to get involved::
www.boazproject.org
www.reecesrainbow.org
www.projecthopeful.org
www.showhope.org
http://www.summit9.org/

Let me know what you believe you need to do in response to Micah 6:8 and James 1:27.  I would LOVE to hear!!

And, thanks again for taking this journey with us!

6 months...

So, in my last post I talked about how Barry and I have felt that we need to live radically, and how both houses are now on the market (Greensburg and Greenwood/Indianapolis).  Well, we have an accepted offer on the Greensburg house and the "Sale Pending" sign is now in our yard.  Incredible.

The first two people that saw the house made offers.  The first was GREAT.  The second we rejected because it was way off from what we wanted to get out of it.  God is working in huge ways just on this.  Unreal.  And, yet, it is real.

This week I started preschool with Sveta.  So far, so good.  She and I are both enjoying it...and she's learning so quickly!!

Yesterday was our "6 months home" day!  We ate potato soup to celebrate.  :)

She's been home 6 months:  Things she knows/does/has said/eats, etc...

1. Can count to 30 (except most days she skips 15 and 22)
2. Can count back from 10 to 1.
3.  Knows all of her letters.
4.  Knows all letter sounds (except she sometimes only remembers one of the sounds G and I make).
5. She knows the following shapes:  circle, square, triangle, rectangle, oval, star, heart.
6. She knows her colors:  white, black, gray, brown, red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple, pink
7. She knows lots of direction words and gets right and left correct most of the time.
8. She will eat/drink burgers, pork, chicken, turkey, fish (salmon and tilapia), noodles, rice, cheese, milk, smoothies, green beans, carrots, potatoes, peppers (if you force her), tomatoes, fruit of all kinds (but she's not a big berry fan).
9. She uses full sentences and repeats whole stories.  She will have you read a book until she's got it memorized...and then she "reads" it.  She wants you to read at least 10 books a day. LOVE it.
10. She answers my cell phone if it rings even though she knows she isn't supposed to.
11. She still likes to pretend to be a baby and to be held and rocked (which I'm happy about).
12. She asks for moloko instead of milk to drink.  Simply because she can't really say milk and she is sick of me asking her to repeat it.  I like that she uses the Russian.  She also uses the word for "don't" and "and."
13.  She's super imaginative!!  She always has a different imaginative game to play: the newest is that we are sisters. 
14. She loves to play with her friends, but she's pretty bossy.  I guess being the oldest at the orphanage is partially to blame.
15. She constantly wants to go somewhere.  Anywhere.  She doesn't even care if it's just to the store.  She doesn't like to just be at home.
16. New phrases:  "check this out," "I got an idea," "how 'bout," "are you sure?" "are you kiddin' me?"
17. She loves to pray.  She sometimes just opens her eyes and thanks God for the fork, spoon, plate, and cup...but sometimes, like last night she said, "Thank you for God and for Jesus, and for everybody, and for life." 
18. She likes to use the churchy answers.  Jesus, and God are common answers when they don't make sense as the answer at all!

That's all I can think of for now.  LOVE LOVE LOVE this girl.  So blessed that God has put her in our lives!!

3 blogs in one??

Sometimes I feel like I have tons and tons and tons of stuff that I want to share, and then life happens and I don't get to do it.  So, today, while Sveta is resting I'm going to try to share three thoughts:

1. Radical living:  It's really messing with me, this thought of living for Jesus.  When you become a beliver, people wrongfully give you the idea that it's all roses after that.  No one tells you that carrying your cross is difficult...I just thought it meant wearing it on my neck.  Jesus says you will be persecuted, He says that your reward will be in Heaven...which means we don't get it here.  But, He says it will be worth it...and I believe Him.  I'm looking at Jesus, and He's calling me...and our family...to live for Him in everyway: to sacrifice what we want to grow His Kingdom.  It's all that matters anyway. To live radically our family has decided that God is asking us to get out of debt.  So, here's our RADICAL plan:  sell our house in Indianapolis, sell our house in Greensburg, move in with Barry's parents, and spend WAY less and pay off our debts as fast as we can.  People think we are crazy, they don't understand, they think we're somehow "off."  I'm ok with that...because I don't want to be like the majority of American Christians who live no differently than the rest of America.  I don't want to go with the cultural norm, I want to go with the Biblical Command.  I'm shaken by the fact that we are more wealthy than 99% of ALL people.  ALL.  Me. Wealthy.  I don't see myself as that...and that's wrong.  So, we're trying to follow Jesus and live as He calls.

2. God is faithful.  All the time.  We listed our houses this week after painting, cleaning, and moving clutter around.  I'm thankful it's done.  Now just to keep it clean.  WOW. Hard.  But so so good.

3. I am not eating Dairy Queen.  Why?  Well, Barry and I had a brilliant plan to help us lose a little bit of weight.  Except I did eat OrangeLeaf earlier this week.  And, today after Sveta's 1st soccer game we went to Dairy Queen:  I ordered a water.  A water.  I was successful today.  Thank goodness!!

Frustration Ends in Love

Sunday evening was not good.  I was someplace between, "I just going to drive my parent's truck through the sunroom" and "I'm going to hire someone to finish what I've started and cannot finish".  My frustration was primarily with the sunroom.  A room I began to remodel years ago and have stalled on finishing ... partly because of time, partly because of finances, and, perhaps mostly, because of a lack of knowledge in how to finish the project. 

Nonetheless, I have moved toward finishing the project.  Paneling is up and it's time to trim around the windows.  I am clueless.  Instead of slopping wood on there, I call a few friends for advice and instruction only after I completely frustrate myself.  I cannot remember the last time I was so frustrated. 

Jessi was a little stressed and frustrated, too.  She says it wasn't me she was frustrated with, but I can assure you all that I did nothing to take any stress away from her. 

At perhaps the peak of our frustration we are all (three of us) riding along in my parent's truck.  No, we are not cruising toward the sunroom.  Yes, I realize I alluded to doing that earlier.  The wife and child would not have been in on that showdown.  This is strictly between me and my creation (the sunroom).

While cruising along Jessi and I are not smiling.  Sveta sits in her seat between us just as cute as a button.  I decide to engage her in conversation.  "Sveta," I say in a rather serious tone, "there is no smiling, no laughing, and no having fun tonight."  (Yes, she has caught on to my sarcasm after only 5 months with us)  "Noooowha", comes her response.  Then a cute, brief 4-year-old-giggle.  Followed with, "I have to smile, daddy."  "Why do you have to smile?" 

Her response puts a smile on Jessi's face and mine. 

Her response puts many things into perspective. 

Her response is the thing which many long to hear ... even to the point of killing themselves to hear.  Literally.

Her response is what gives life to hope and brings death to despair.

Her response has been learned in 5 months and will be unpacked for all eternity.

Her response:  "Because Jesus loves me"

Frustration finds its end in love.

I have learned many things since this little girl entered my life.  I have learned how many times I can ask someone to do something before I need to leave the room in frustration.  I have learned that I can love my wife FULLY and FULLY love a child at the same time.  I have learned what it feels like to have a little girl scream "daddy!" and ran at you with open arms. I have learned the helpless feeling of holding a child in pain (physical or emotional) and know there is nothing you can do but cry together.  I have learned that the white 'play shoes' are what she wants to wear everyday.  I have learned that I simply cannot make a pony-tail look good ... on anyone including myself. 

Many things in my life have changed.  I eat differently.  I sleep lighter.  I shut doors.  I move knives away from the end of counter tops.  I read kids books ... over and over.  I pretend to be many things in many places. 

One thing that hasn't changed is the love of God.  And it's amazing the way this little girl can remind me of it every day. 

A 4 year old can be a picture of ultimate selfishness.  She's simply not learned to hide it the way I have.  We don't grow out of this 4 year old state of selfishness.  Instead, I am convinced we manipulate it and mask it and hide it ... but it's still there.  She, just like me, deserves hell.  "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8).  Reason to smile.  


I am amazed at the immeasurable amount of patience God extends toward me in my countless selfish endeavors.  I am amazed at the way He loves me, despite me.  


The brokenness that surrounded us in that truck ...
... a child once an orphan, three selfish persons, a young man who so deeply wants to be proven by the work of his own hands, a beautiful young lady who longs for a restored community ...
... that brokenness that surrounded us in that truck is overwhelmed in the face of a matchless love which is unrivaled by all the hell and brokenness that may surround any one person or the entire population of the globe.  

There is nothing greater than the love of God.  


I experience it each day when I hug my wife and my daughter.
I experience it each time a friend comes and helps with my house.


I will never know the depth of God's love, but I will enjoy swimming deeper and deeper into it. 

Confessions of a sinner...who desires for MORE.

I should be cleaning, or preparing my house to look perfect for when some new friends come over for dinner tonight...but I'm not.  Because the more I think about it, the more I don't want a "perfect" house.  I would trade the "need" to have a perfect house for almost anything.  Because, here's a little secret my friends...I don't actually NEED a perfect house, nor a clean one.  Most of the world has neither and doesn't even think twice. 

I'm learning a lot about the American Dream and a lot about the dream of living the Gospel...and how actually...they don't mesh very well.  See, here's how I've learned to live...and, things that I've thought recently. 

1. My house must be clean, nicely decorated, and I must have a great meal prepared along with matching china before I can invite friends over for dinner.

2. I must have 2 cars.  They must be in working order, and have lots of bells and whistles:: push a button your window goes down, plug in your ipod, turn on the a/c, etc, etc, etc.  And if I have one child, I should probably own a mini-van or some other large vehicle. 

3. I just got birthday money...how should I spend it on myself?  Maybe I should use the money along with money I make off of selling my ipod and Kindle to buy myself an ipad.

4. I have one pair of shorts that fit, and one pair of jeans.  I should go buy new ones.

5. There are really cute Merrell's in my size for "super cheap."  I could get some more shoes.

6. I don't want to get messy and try to serve Jesus here.  I'd rather pack for a week somewhere and love on orphans than love on the children and families of Decatur county.  Why?  Because the orphans didn't do anything to deserve their plight.  The people here should know how to live "better." 

7. I really want to do well with selling Pampered Chef...then maybe my name would be on the "top sellers" list that all consultants see...and that'd be AWESOME.

8. Maybe instead of cooking tonight, I'll just have my family go out to eat.  $35 isn't that much.

9. This coffee is the least expensive.  And it has a fun flavor.  Got to have it. 

10. Church.  I think I can do this thing.  I can create an event where people want to come and fall in love with Jesus there.  It'll be great.  We'll have a great speaker, nice decorations, yummy food...and great coffee!

So, here I sit, in my sin.  Thinking these things.  Judging others.  Putting myself on a pedestal and thinking that my glory and my power is greater than God's.  Humbled...that's what I am.  I'm not greater than He...and in His grace He's teaching me to invest and live in His Kingdom with His glory and purposes in mind. Here's what His upside-down Kingdom tells me in opposition to my own human-ness:  (I'm not trying to claim that this is Absolute Truth...simply that in my walk to be like Christ...this is what He's teaching me)

1. Invite people into your home.  Share a meal.  Break bread. Talk about Me.  And, don't invite people over who can pay you back.  Invite the poor, the broken, the needy, the foreigner, the orphan.

2. Materials will pass away...and only He will remain.  Stop trusting in a hunk of metal to take care of you and get you where you need to go.  Half the places you go, you don't need to go anyway.

3. That money was given to you as a blessing.  Use it to bless.  Don't hoard it on yourself.  It's not really yours anyway.  Further MY Kingdom, not your own.

4. Stop eating the stuff you don't need, and take care of the body I gave you.  Then your clothes would fit and you wouldn't feel the need to waste money on clothes you don't actually need.

5. Really, do you need 21 pairs of shoes?  Your brothers and sisters around the world...they've never even owned a pair of shoes...and they are in pain because of having to walk so far to fetch water without shoes on their feet.

6. You are the worst of them all.  You think you are perfect and holy, when you have so far to go.  (and I am).  I'm not better than any...and I shouldn't judge those that have less than I.  Whether they are in Decatur County, or Russia, or Kenya, they are children of God.  End of story.

7.  Even if people that get that email think you are great...I will know the truth.  You did it for your glory...and not for Mine.

8. $35.  Actually allows a Kenyan orphan to go to school, have food, and supplies for a MONTH.

9. This coffee might be cheap...but it is costing a great deal to the farmers who are enslaved by the company that makes it.  Is your flavored coffee really worth continuing to support companies who literally are enslaving thousands daily?

10. You can do nothing without My power.  So, go ahead, throw yourself into this event...or pray.  Ask me to show you who to invite in, who to love on, and watch as many come to know me.

American Dream?  Gospel centered dream?

My dream is to live differently for Jesus.  To love Him with abandon and to stop caring what this world says.  This world, it's not my home.  His Kingdom is all that matters, and I want my life to mimic His hopes, dreams, and goals...and for all the glory to go to Him.

What is your dream??

Help another orphan...

Incredible organization::  Project Hopeful.  Check them out:: www.projecthopeful.org.

They need you.  Go to http://www.cultivatewines.com/give and vote for them, once a day for the next 8 days.  They're in the running for a gift from the company for 50,000.  AMAZING.  Please take 3 minutes and vote.

Thanks!